The Reason
by xxNight Angelxx
Summary: I never believed in soul mates, I mean, it’s all fairy tale stuff, right? The stories your parents read you to help you sleep, it’s not real. At least, that’s what I thought, until she entered my life. I never really realised at first, but she’s mine.
1. Dates

**Summary: **I never believed in soul mates, I mean, it's all fairy tale stuff, right? The stories your parents read you to help you sleep, it's not real. At least, that's what I thought, until she entered my life. I never really realised at first, but she's mine.

**A/N & Disclaimer: **All right, so this is my first WW story, and I probably haven't done a particularly good job at keeping the characters the same but I've tried, and you can't fault me that. This would be a good place to say that if these were my characters they would definitely be portrayed well, but they're not, so they can't be mine. Also, one last thing, as I live in the UK (which makes it really weird writing 'mom' instead of 'mum') and I haven't seen season 6 yet, but I know a little about it from the stuff I've read so this is kind of like my take on why Donna leaves. It's like an un-filmed story that they decided against using to go for the one they filmed. My twisted mind came up with the idea and it won't leave me alone so I had to get it written.

**Feedback: **Feel free to tell me what you think, good or bad.

* * *

Josh's Office, West Wing, White House 

"Donna!" Josh's voice shouted out to her through the semi-open door.

She sighed. Why did he always do that? He should know by now, whenever he shouted she was just outside, like she could sense she was needed. She took a quick gulp of coffee before entering her boss's office.

"What?" She asked him shortly.

"Sit down," his face was unreadable but his eyes had that teasing spark they often did.

She grudgingly sat down, she was sure she could guess what was coming, it was always the same. He would tease her about something, she would get annoyed, he'd say something, she'd storm off and by the end of the day they'd be back together; Josh and Donna, a team once again.

"How was your date last night?"

Donna had been taking another mouthful of coffee and began choking at his question. 'Or not,' she thought with some surprise.

"It was good," she lied to him; she couldn't take another day-after evaluation of her bad taste in men off him.

Josh knew she was lying, he wasn't stupid. She was the person he knew and could read the best, which was odd when you factored in that she was one of the most emotionally closed-off people he knew. Even still he didn't push it, he didn't really want the conversation again either, although it was fun just to see her cute pale face frown in annoyance. He smiled at the thought.

"Good," Josh said. "In that case can you get me the file for that meeting I have later?"

"Sure," she said standing up, even more surprised by his behaviour.

He'd kept quiet, he knew she was lying and he still hadn't said anything, Donna couldn't help but be surprised. This was Josh after all. The same Josh who was quite happy to point out any faults if she was miserable, just so she could get the disappointment all over at once, and yet here he was keeping quiet. How could she not be surprised?

She grabbed his file off her desk and brought it back. "Here," she said, placing it neatly on his desk.

He smiled his thanks; she sat back in the chair, now it was Josh's turn to say,

"What?"

"I just wanted to say, you were right," she said it with a heartfelt smile, grateful for him being in such a un-Josh-like mood.

"I often am," Josh said with nearly a straight face, making Donna give a short burst of laughter. "What about this time?"

"You said I was wasting my time with him. You were right. And I know I wasn't very nice to you when you said it, but I appreciate you looking out for me. You're like my big brother." She gave him a hug before leaving the room.

- - - - - - - -

'Brother…Brother…I'm like her brother?' The thought kept replaying in his mind. 'I just can't believe that after all this time that's still all she sees me as. We've been working together for six years now and she still only sees me as a brother!'

When Josh first saw her he thought she was weird, he'd be the first person to admit that, but she grew on him and vice versa. She was more than just an assistant to him, and she was more than a sister, too. They both knew every little habit each of them had, they helped each other, and they looked out for each other. He wasn't sure if he could have got through some of things he'd faced if she wasn't there with me. They were more like best friends; they connected in ways that made him shiver when he thought about it. Even Sam didn't know him as well as Donna did and it annoyed him to think that still she only thought of him as a brother. Not a friend, or a best friend, but a brother!

'I suppose it's better than her just seeing me as a boss but still…Hold on, why am I even bothering about this? What time is it? Oh, God, it's 7.30, I've been thinking about this for four hours and I have a date in one hour.'

"Donna!" He shouted for the second time that day.

She came in with a bright smile on her face this time.

"Oh Josh, good. I was beginning to think you'd died or something, you've been quiet so long." There was humour in her voice that matched that beautiful smile of hers.

"Ha," he answered dryly and sarcastically. "As much as I would love to sit here and make some fun out of you, I have to go. Do I have anything else scheduled?"

"That meeting, the one you made me get the folder for you for…You have looked at it, right?" She was looking at him with one of her famous scolding looks, like she's annoyed and about to roll her eyes but doesn't want to make it too obvious just how frustrated with him she is.

"Uh…no," he answered sheepishly, shrinking under her hard glare.

He began to panic. There was no doubt in his mind that he was about to face Donna's wrath, again, and then he'd wind up being late and he'd have to deal with Kim too. There had to be a way out of this. Then her eyes brightened and sparkled and a grin spread over her face.

"Relax Josh, I moved it to midday tomorrow. I wouldn't have done if Kim hadn't phoned to remind you about your date tonight." She raised her eyebrows at him. "Who's Kim?"

Relief was washing over him so quickly that Josh wasn't sure what to say at first. "She's a uh…She's an assistant at Stanley's office. Leo made me go see him again and I met her there."

"Hmm," Donna said, picking his backpack up for him as he stood up to put his coat on. "What's she like?"

"I don't know. This is our first date, the 'getting to know each other' night."

Donna nodded slowly, "Is she pretty?"

"Of course," Josh said with a smug smile.

They were leaving his office now and heading towards the front entrance.

"Prettier than me?" Donna asked, a sweet innocent look on her face.

Josh looked over at her and grinned. "Absolutely," he announced as he put his badge into the machine to leave the building.

Donna hit him playfully on the arm as she too put her card in and they left the White House.

"You want me to help you get ready?" Donna asked.

She was always at a loose end when they finished early. She was used to the late-night sessions in the office, if they ever did finish early she ended up going home and taking a stack of work with her but she forgot to bring any out with her tonight. Josh was well aware of this fact and took pity on his assistant.

"Sure, you can pick me out some clothes while I have a shower."

Josh saw her nod before she went oddly quiet and the two of them walked to his apartment.

- - - - - - - -

Josh's Apartment

Donna looked around his apartment and smiled, it still looked the same bombsite mess.

"You still haven't tidied," she remarked.

Josh shrugged, "I'm never here to, and when I am I can't be bothered so what's the point? Besides, I know where everything is."

She considered his words and nodded. "I guess…Go take a shower, I'll sort your clothes out."

"Yes, mom," Josh muttered as he went into his bathroom.

Donna entered his bedroom and headed straight for his wardrobe.

"You have no clean shirts," she said, to herself more than him since he was in the bathroom after all. "Why does that not surprise me?"

She looked around his room and could see no sign of any clean clothes so she went back into the main part of his apartment. She looked around.

'He really does need to tidy this mess up,' she thought with frustration until she spotted a small bag in the corner.

"Laundry."

She headed over and the relief she felt was instantaneous when she realised it was clean and folded. She rummaged through until she found a shirt. Normally she would have ironed it for him but it had taken so long for her to even find a shirt in the first place she was scared to try and find an iron. She'd just ask him when he got out of the shower. She grabbed him a pair of trousers from the bag and headed back into his bedroom. She didn't hear the water stop running so didn't know he was out of the shower until she walked back into his room to find him stood there with a towel around his waist and water dripping from his hair and down his chest and stomach.

'Oh God,' not for the first time, Donna found herself wishing her skin wasn't so pale and sensitive as she felt the blush creeping up into her cheeks. Josh didn't seem to notice though as he grinned at her.

"You sorted my clothes?"

She held out the trousers to him. "Where's your iron? This needs doing."

He took the trousers from her outstretched hand. "In the kitchen. Second cupboard on the right."

"Oh…" Donna said, wondering why it would possibly be in there. "Alright, back in a minute."

She quickly fled from the room, feeling her discomfort fade as she got further from the bedroom. She went to the cupboard he'd said and plugged the iron in, taking deep calming breaths as she waited for it to heat up. She had to lay the shirt on the counter since there was no sign of an ironing board, which, knowing Josh was probably laying underneath his bed because nothing was ever where it should be in this flat. She gave it a quick once-over but was careful to take all the creases. Just as she was finishing, Josh came out of the bedroom. His trousers were on and his hair was damp and sticking up in funny positions but he was still topless. Donna fought the blush that tried to rise once more.

"Here's your shirt," she told him curtly, handing it to him as she passed on her way to his bathroom.

"Thanks," he said slowly, even his tone sounded like the frown his face was showing.

She was back out a minute later, glad to see his shirt was on.

"Come here," she said pulling him towards her.

"What?"

"You can't go out looking like that," she commented with a small giggle.

She lowered his head and ran the comb she had just got from the bathroom through it. She lifted his head once more, cupping his face with her hands.

"Much better," she remarked with a smile, as she looked him up and down critically.

His baby blue shirt hung casually over his black trousers and his hair no longer had that just-got-out-of-bed look but rather had its normal Josh-like quality. She lowered her head to look him over again but stopped when she met his eyes. He was looking at her intently and he was so close she could feel his breath on her skin.

"Thank you," he said quietly.

And suddenly it was too much for Donna to handle. She quickly let go of his face and moved back, nearly to the other side of the room.

"No problem, now hurry up. You don't want to be late for your first date do you?"

If he noticed the abruptness in her tone or her sudden change in attitude he didn't let it show. Instead he nodded and grabbed his jacket to protect himself from the chilling breeze outside. He was headed to the door but stopped and turned back to look at Donna oddly.

"Are you going to stay here all night? Because people will talk." He was joking, she knew and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Actually, can I just hang around for a bit? I'll be gone before you get back," she promised him.

"No problem," Josh said giving her a smile before he opened the door.

"And Josh?" She called before he shut it. He turned to look at her before he was done. "Good luck." His smile turned to a grin before the door closed and Donna was left in his apartment alone.

She let out a deep breath. She hadn't exactly been holding it, but there seemed to be a lot of air inside her.

'Get a grip Donnatella,' she warned herself mentally. 'He's your _boss_.'

Giving an almost lovesick sigh, Donna sat on Josh's couch before deciding that, since she wasn't actually doing anything, she may as well make herself useful and began tidying Josh's apartment. She left at around midnight and felt a pang of jealousy that Josh still wasn't back.


	2. Amazing Women

Josh's Apartment

Josh practically danced his way back to his apartment he was that happy. After a brief moment of uncomfortableness between himself and Kim the evening had gone perfectly. They'd met outside her apartment just like they arranged and went for a walk around Washington. They stopped at a small but cosy late-night Italian place Donna had told Josh about once, breaking their conversation only to eat. At first it had been difficult to know what to say as the nervousness of their first date got the better of them, but soon they were talking about everything and loving every minute of it. Josh had walked Kim back to her place before giving her a slight peck on the cheek and arranging another date for two nights later. Then he headed back to his apartment, feeling light and happy at the nights events. It was half one by the time he got home.

By the time he reached the hall on which his apartment was situated, Josh was practically drunk with happiness. Never had he had such a successful first date. With his last girlfriend, Amy, they had rarely gone out. That relationship was mostly physical, not that Josh complained but any talking they did was nine times out of ten about some political argument or something of that nature. They rarely really talked but tonight he and Kim talked, a lot. He knew about her family, her hobbies, how she felt about her patients, everything. There were only three other people he spoke to like he did her; his mother, Sam and Donna, but there was something different about the way he spoke to them and the way he spoke to Kim.

He put the key in his door, words forming in his mouth the minute it opened.

"That's right bow down before me for I am Josh, master of good dates," he smirked at the end of this.

He didn't know who he was talking to. He knew there would be no one there but he supposed some part of him hoped Donna would be. Like always. It didn't matter who he had spent his evening with or how good it had been, he always entered his apartment hoping Donna would be there waiting for him. She never was. That was why he often picked up his phone in these early hours and dialled her number to hear her tired voice, like now. She picked up on the third ring.

"What do you want Josh?" Donna sleepy voice snapped down the line in her normal early-normal greeting. He was the only one who would ever call her at such ridiculous times so she felt duty bound to make him suffer a little for it.

"I was just making sure you got home alright."

"Uh-huh, I got home fine, now let me sleep," she sounded slightly annoyed, which just made Josh want to bug her more.

"You don't want to hear about my date?"

"I can think of nothing I would hate more."

"Great," Josh answered cheerily. "I'll tell you all about it then."

He heard her groan as he moved from his bedroom, where his phone was situated, and went into the main area to sit on his couch, phone in his hand.

"Alright so we walked…" He launched into a long winded tale about his night; every so often he could hear Donna give a little snore. This was when he would shout her name to wake her up and then carry on.

He was about half way through when he realised for the first time that he was sat on his couch and there was nothing sticking into his butt or back. He stopped talking and looked around his room in shock, the whole place was tidy.

"Josh? Josh? What's wrong? Is everything alright?" Donna's gentle panicked voice came down the line and spoke directly into his ear.

"My apartment…" Josh said in awe.

"What about it?" Donna asked, obviously worried. "You haven't set fire to it or anything have you?"

"No…" Josh answered slowly, pausing before continuing. "It's tidy."

"Oh," Donna said and laughed at a little, despite the tiredness. "Yeah, I got bored."

"You did it?"

"Yeah, what'd you think, some magic fairy flown in and did it for you? On second thoughts, don't answer that," she said to him, not too tired for sarcasm.

"Funny Donna, funny," Josh remarked with just as much sarcasm. "I'm just surprised, why would you do that?"

He could almost see Donna shrug as she lay in bed. "I'm your assistant, I'm meant to make sure you're organised and you weren't organised."

"Yeah, my office, not my home."

"Whatever, I'm tired, let me sleep. You can thank me in the morning."

There was a pause and then a groan and then Donna spoke again, "Or in a few hours even. Josh its three o'clock!"

"Oh, I suppose I should let you sleep then, no point in both of us not having any."

"Yeah…" then there was a click and the dial tone.

Josh hung up his own phone and looked around his whole apartment with a grin. She'd picked up all his dirty clothes and apparently taken them with her because there was no sign of them in his apartment. The clean clothes in the laundry bag had been ironed (on the ironing board she had found not under his bed but I his bathroom) and put in his wardrobe. His bed had been made, his rubbish put away and his floors brushed and hovered. Dirty dishes had been washed and put away in the right cupboards, things that shouldn't have been in them had been put away correctly, too. He half expected to see a white lacy doily on his coffee table but he knew Donna wouldn't do that. All in all, the place looked like it had done when he'd first moved in, minus a few boxes and add a couple of pieces of furniture.

'God that girl is amazing,' was his last thought before he took his clothes off, taking care to put them in the laundry basket Donna had unearthed in her cleaning frenzy, and went to bed.

- - - - - - - -

Josh's Office

"She's amazing," Josh told Donna for the fifth time that hour, she was getting tired of it now.

"You said," she answered briskly, taking the file off his desk and replacing it with another one.

Josh leaned back casually in his chair, hands relaxed behind head and feet propped up on his desk.

"Did I tell you about what she did last night?"

"Only a couple of times," Donna muttered.

It didn't matter what Donna said, Josh was too wrapped up in his happiness to hear a word, never mind notice her tone. Once again he launched into a retelling of the previous nights events in which Kim had surprised him by showing up at his apartment before he even got home and cooking the two of them a romantic meal.

"That's why I asked her to move in," Josh announced. "I think I might be –"

What he might be Donna could guess but didn't want to hear, and besides, there was other stuff she wanted to know about more.

"You did what?" she interrupted him, trying to keep her voice from sounding too much like a screech.

"I asked her to move in," Josh repeated in a slower voice. "Didn't I tell you that?"

"No," Donna answered loudly. "Josh, you've only been going out with her for two weeks, how could you possibly move in with her?"

Josh shrugged a smile still on his face despite the fact that Donna was obviously stressed about his announcement. "It just feels right."

"Right," Donna answered coolly. At least he hadn't said he loved her - that would have been too much. "Well there's your file, I'll be back in a minute, I'm going to go get a muffin. Do you want anything?"

"No, thanks, Kim says I need to eat healthily."

"I'm sure she does," Donna muttered darkly before storming from the room, slamming the door as she left.

She glared at everyone who turned to see what the noise was for and they quickly got back to their work, scared the look might actually attack them. Donna stormed away from Josh's office and fully intended on leaving the White House before someone called her name.

Donna fought back the need to hit the woman who shouted her. She didn't want to hear this all right now but what choice did she have? She'd already been spotted. Of course, she could just keep walking, pretend she hadn't heard anything but then the woman shouted her again. Donna took a calming breath.

"Kim, hi!" She said brightly, turning to face the woman who was taking Josh from her.

She was pretty, Donna had to admit that. She had shoulder length dark hair that usually fell in curls but was currently tied back in a loose pony tail. Her hazel eyes shone brightly behind her rectangular glasses. She reminded Donna slightly of Amy in personality, but there were obvious differences. Kim, for example, spoke a lot more and was friendlier with Donna than Amy had ever been, especially after the question.

'What is it with Josh and brunettes?' Donna thought darkly. 'Maybe I should dye hair, and then he might see what's right in front of him, though I doubt it.'

Kim had been talking enthusiastically up to this point, Donna only tuned in to hear, "…Did he tell you about last night?"

"That he asked you to move in?" Donna asked, trying to be excited but she couldn't help but think that should be her. She really though Josh might change after the whole Gaza incident, but obviously she was wrong. "Yeah, I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks Donna. I knew you would be."

Donna smiled at the woman, a fake smile but it still seemed bright. 'Just go,' Donna thought desperately.

"Do you want to see Josh? You know where his office is, just go right through." There, wasn't too hard, now take the clue.

"Oh, yeah, obviously, thanks!" And then Kim scuttled off towards Josh's office leaving Donna to once again curse Josh silently as she went to get it all out of her system.

- - - - - - - -

Josh was, for once, reading one of his files. Donna hadn't prepared any notes of the key points so he had to read it through himself. Damn her. There was a knock at the door, a welcome relief for his struggling mind.

"Come in," he called out.

The door opened and in came Kim holding a cup of coffee for him. "Hey baby."

A grin lit up Josh's face. A _very_ welcome relief. "Hi," he said, standing up and heading towards her, taking the coffee and putting it on his desk before wrapping her in a hug and giving her a kiss.

"So, what'd I do to deserve this?" He asked her playfully.

"Oh, nothing, I just thought I'd come say 'hi' to my new roomie."

Josh pouted, "Only 'hi'?"

"Hmm," Kim said, pretending to think about it. "Maybe something else."

"Oh?" Josh lifted an eyebrow.

"Yeah," Kim said, giving him a kiss. "Something like," she gave him another kiss. "I have a surprise for you when you get home," another kiss was delivered. "And if you're late you won't be getting it."

Josh leaned in to receive another kiss from her but it was never delivered. He pulled back and surveyed her. Her arms were folded across her chest and her face looked deadly serious.

"I'll be there," he promised, which made Kim smile. "Now come here. You owe me a kiss."

* * *

**A/N: **I just want to say stuff to my reviewers, which I will do in a sec, I just need to ask a favour of my readers first. Could someone please tell me if season 6 explains what happened to Sam? I keep watching season 4 and I can't tell if he won, lost it but decided to stay in California or if he took up the President's offer of another job. So yeah, can someone tell me that? And can someone tell me what was said when Donna told Josh she was leaving? I've been looking for quotes and the one site I found with season 6 quotes didn't quote that bit rolls eyes. Answering both questions aren't imperative, it'd just be good because I want to use them later on.

Alright, on with replies:

**kursk** of course he will act eventually (what kind of J/D fic would it be if he didn't?), but the course of true love never does run smoothly, does it?

**JDfanactic **Thank you, this soon enough? The very next day. I'm impressed with myself, I usually leave, like, a week between chapters.

**Caia **lol, no it's not the end, there's at least 5 chapters, maybe more, I haven't written them yet so we'll see. And I'm glad you liked it, I did a bit in the apartment, did you see? Not a very good bit...It was meant to be funnier...I don't seem to write comedy well...

**sekinsey **Thank you so much. I really did a good job with the characters? Yay!

**Nicole10 **I'm glad you like it so, you're one of my favourite writers on here so it's good that you do.

:D Thanks to anyone who's read and hasn't reviewed, I'd love to hear from you.


	3. Special Meeting

White House Corridor

"Something's going on," CJ announced as she and Toby headed to their staff meeting the next day.

"Okay," Toby answered gruffly in his caring-pretending-to-be-uncaring way.

Well really, what was he meant to say? This was the same woman who would think something potentially damaging was going on if you put a bunch of nuns in the same room. 'It must be her press secretary side,' Toby thought. 'Makes her suspicious.'

"Tobias, pay more attention," she snapped at him. "Watch them, he's walking round like he's in paradise and she's so miserable she looks like she's going to break down in tears at any minute."

"So?" Toby asked, not seeing her point.

CJ sighed and rolled her eyes. "There's obviously something going on," she repeated.

"Like what?" Toby asked, his question making CJ be quiet for a moment while she thought about it.

"I don't know," she admitted. "But I know someone who will."

And with that she hurried off faster down the hall, Toby jogged after her, cursing her long legs and fast speed.

"Tell me he's ready for us?" CJ asked Debbie as she reached the foyer for The President's office.

"Sure, go on through," Debbie answered with a smile that soon changed to a smirk when she saw Toby arrive. "You know gyms have those machines now to help you stay fit, you should try them," she informed Toby who snarled in response.

Smiling, Debbie got on with the sorting of papers while CJ and Toby entered The President's office.

"Well," Jed said seeing the two of them standing there. "Not that I'm not impressed with your eagerness for these meetings but what the hell are you doing here so early? There's still ten minutes to go."

"CJ seems to think you can shed some light on a situation she's become more than a little obsessed with," Toby answered, ignoring the glare he received from CJ.

"What situation?" Jed asked, confused and worried at the same time.

"It's about Josh…" Toby began to say but was cut off.

"What's he done now?" Jed asked impatiently.

"Well isn't that the million dollar question?" CJ quipped quickly before Toby could answer for her. "And it's not you I wanted to speak to; can I use your phone?"

"No," Jed answered but CJ had already picked it up but was dialling out.

"Don't let Josh in," she instructed as the phone began ringing.

"Seaborn's Sweatshop," a woman's voice answered sincerely. "How may I directly your call?"

In the background CJ could hear her old friend's voice shouting "Carolyn give me that phone right now!" There was a little crackling and muttered conversation before a familiar voice spoke on the phone.

"Hello?" Sam's voice sounded tired.

"Spanky," CJ responded quickly. "I hope you're working hard."

"How could I not be, _Flamingo_," Sam said, his voice seemed lighter now making CJ smile despite the 'flamingo' reference.

"I can still beat your ass Seaborn, don't you forget that," CJ advised him dangerously.

An irritated cough sounded from Jed but CJ still heard Sam laughing on the end and knew he was about to make some quick comment, she cut him off quickly.

"Look, as much as I'd like to chat we're meant to be doing the staff meeting and Josh is locked outside because…I need your help." Maybe it was her tone or maybe it was just Sam's nostalgia at hearing his old friend again but he was more than willing to help.

"Shoot," he said to her.

"Alright, hold on while I put you on speakerphone," there was a quiet click when CJ pressed the button and then she spoke again. "I want you to tell me what's going on with Josh."

- - - -

­Campaign Headquarters, California

The last thing Sam had expected that day was to hear the voice of the Acting White House Chief of Staff asking him for help, least of all about his best friend.

"I want you to tell me what's going on with Josh."

Her voice was so determined to get a response that he supposed she didn't want to hear "Josh? What about him? He's okay isn't he?" Luckily Toby's voice spoke up loudly, but not so lucky that it went right down his ear.

"Oh for God's sake Claudia Jean, will you get a grip? There's nothing wrong with him and even if he did how would Sam know? He's over two thousand miles away."

"Toby's probably right," Sam said, though he had no trouble believing it didn't sound like that, if there was even any sound at all because it sounded like there was murder at the other end.

"Two thousand miles away or not, they're still best friends. You're just pissy that Josh won't open up to you," CJ shouted at Toby.

"I prefer it that way; Josh gets really girly when he opens up."

"Oh, right, I forgot, Toby doesn't like feelings…Or emotions of any kind, they're weak." Her tone was taunting and Sam knew this wasn't going to be good.

"Er…Guys," he tried to interrupt but he was too quiet.

It wasn't like he could shout could he? Unlike them he was in a room full of people who already thought he was crazy keeping them up so late. While it was a normal time for the White House with their meeting at 8 am, it was still only 4 am in California and those staff who had been allowed to go home were more than likely asleep, Sam had made the others stay to help him finish this new approach to the campaign. However, he didn't need to worry about the shouting for much longer, a loud voice shouted in the room CJ and Toby were in, it was so loud that Sam, who already had the phone at least 5 centimetres away from his ear, jumped and pulled it away even further.

"Enough! You two are acting like a couple of school children, I bet Sam's happy to be away right now."

Sam laughed. "Yes sir, but you still have you're effect, I think you might have deafened my other ear."

Jed chuckled, "Sorry but you know how these two can get."

Sam smiled widely. "I remember. So, what do you need help about Josh with?"

Jed sighed, "I have no idea, CJ share with us all and please, speak." He slowly pronounced the last word to emphasise its importance.

"Alright," she said in her professional voice, one she often reserved for the press corps. "Well, here's the thing; Josh has been strutting around for the last two weeks grinning like the Cheshire cat while poor Donna's been getting worse and worse. I saw her before, she was in earlier than usual and she didn't look like she'd slept all that much. Something's going on and Sam knows what."

"No I don't," Sam answered a little too quickly.

"Sam?" CJ called sweetly.

"Yeah?" He answered nervously.

"You wouldn't be lying now would you?"

"Of course not," his voice was a little higher than normal.

"Spill it," this time it wasn't CJ talking, it was Jed and he sounded impatient.

That wasn't a good thing, the President in a good mood could be bad enough but making him angry, well, that was a whole different thing entirely.

"Alright, okay, but I never told any of you," Sam said, hoping they wouldn't say anything.

"Of course," CJ urged him.

Sam took a deep breath, if Josh hadn't told them then he didn't want them to know yet here he was, betraying his trust. "Joshua's in love and not with Donna," he said quickly.

"What?" CJ screeched. "Of course with Donna, who else would he be in love with?"

"Her name's Kim…I forget her surname…Jeffries or something like that, she works with Doctor Key –"

"Keyworth," Jed finished. "Stanley Keyworth, Kim Jenkins, right?"

"Yeah, that's her."

"But…" Sam could tell CJ was having trouble digesting all this. "What about Donna?"

"I asked him the same thing. He said, and these are his exact words, 'What about her? She's just my assistant, nothing more. I know you all hope there's something more, maybe I did at one point too, but it's not there anymore. It hasn't been for a long time'."

"'A long time' my ass," Toby announced. "If there was nothing there he wouldn't have gone to Germany and threatened to blow up the Middle East."

"I tried telling him that," Sam informed him. "But he just said something about that being care for his assistant and it was in the past now anyway because he has Kim."

"But it's nothing serious with them is it? I mean, they can't have been going out for more than a few weeks."

"Two weeks and two days," Sam answered, nodding even though they couldn't see him. "But you tell me how serious it is. He thinks he's in love and he asked her to move in with him a few nights ago."

"What?" CJ screeched again. "When…How could we not…Poor Donna."

Toby, who had been quiet for a while now, began laughing.

"Is Toby laughing?" Sam asked, he'd only heard that sound once so it was one he committed to memory, but even so, memories fade and he might not remember it clearly.

"Yes," CJ said harshly. "What's so funny?" She rounded on her best friend.

"You, 'poor Donna'," he mimicked her. "Maybe Josh genuinely isn't as in love with Donna as you thought; maybe he's happier with this Kim woman. And if that's true then it's better for Donna that she finds out now so she can move on and stop wasting her life."

"I don't buy it," CJ announced and, though Sam couldn't see it, he knew she had folded her arms and was giving Toby a stern 'we'll talk about this later' look.

"You don't need to, you just need to…"

What she needed to do Sam couldn't hear because someone was suddenly shouting him. "Guys, I have to go. Phone any time you like, I miss you guys."

"You too," CJ said.

"Yeah," Jed said in agreement.

"Get back here," Toby said in an almost desperate tone. "Bailey's going to drive me mental now he's with Russell."

"You can't get worse," Sam laughed before saying goodbye a final time and hanging up.

- - - -

The President's Office, West Wing

"Don't even give us that look," Toby warned CJ who was looking at him and the President with a desperate pleading look.

"But we need to do something."

"No," Toby answered. "We don't need to do anything, there's nothing we can do, and sometimes a person needs to make their own mistakes."

"Fine," CJ barked. "You'll will help me, won't you sir?" She looked at her President desperately.

"Sorry, I agree with Toby," he looked almost scared to say it to CJ.

CJ glared at the two men. "You two have no romance in your souls, you know that?"

"Yeah," Toby answered. "It's what keeps me sane, now can we get on with the proper meeting?"

"Oh God, they're still outside aren't they?" Jed asked heading for the door.

- - - -

Waiting Area outside the President's Office

"Oh good, I was beginning to think I was the only one not in there. We're not here at the wrong time are we because I haven't seen The President, CJ or Toby and Debbie's being more weird than usual. I think they might be in there though because I keep hearing muffled shouting." Josh was talking to Will who had just come running up.

"No," he said, taking a breath. "But it hasn't started yet? Good, I thought I was going to be late, Russell's had me running around since I got in this morning, and I only just got the message that The President wanted me here."

"He did? Why?"

"Didn't say," Will said with a shrug.

"Oh," Josh would have said more but the door to The President's office opened and sure enough there stood The President, CJ and Toby.

"What?" Josh asked with a teasing smile. "You held the meeting without us? I'm hurt you guys."

* * *

**A/N: **Two chapters in one day? You guys are lucky...Or I'm just really bored!

**Meganfitz **Thanks for the review, I'm glad you liked it.

**kursk **Donna, do something stupid? As if! And thanks for answering my question about Sam. I didn't think it was I just wanted tomake sure before I wrote this chapter.


	4. Plans and Bars

Donna's Apartment

It was getting harder for her to face each day. She felt like such an idiot. Why was she still here? She lay awake at night wondering that very thing. She could say she liked her job but truth is she found it monotonous. She was too good for it, she knew it and she knew Josh did too, even if he didn't want to admit it. And her colleagues, she did love them, they were like a second family to her but they weren't enough to keep her doing this, so what was making her stay?

The answer was so obvious, maybe that's why she hadn't noticed it before, like how you can't see what's right under your nose. Or maybe it was that she had noticed but hadn't wanted to believe it because when she finally realised she got a sense that she'd known all along, and maybe she did, who knew really? The fact of the matter was that she knew her reason and it was the same one that made her want to leave. Josh. It all came back to Josh. Joshua bloody Lyman.

'What am I going to do?' She thought surprisingly calm. She should have guessed something like this would happen, she always went for the wrong guys and then she finds the right one and he happens to be her best friend, her boss and, unfortunately, completely in love with another woman. This was just so Donna. She needed to do something, to vent or forget or…

Her thoughts finished in a different place to her body for she was already out of bed, had grabbed her bag and was out of her apartment and heading down the street. She was lucky Josh had let her finish early because it meant there was still time for her to head to the bar. As her mind wandered to why he had let her finish early Donna's eager quest for the bar increased in speed.

"Your strongest drink," she declared the second she opened the door.

"Someone's looking to forget," a bar patron commented as she reached the bar.

"Shut it Jim, I'm not in the mood." She downed the drink, and another, and another.

Seven more drinks and Donna was well and truly drunk.

"I'm impressed," Jim said. "I've never seen anyone drink ten of them and still be able to sit upright right never mind stand."

He was talking to the bartender because Donna was no longer sat at the bar but instead was stood over by a dirty old jukebox in the corner selecting a song. The bartender nodded in agreement but soon stopped when he saw Donna.

She was no longer by the jukebox but instead attempting to climb onto a table as a song came from the jukebox. Donna, in a rather slurred and tearful voice began singing along to it whilst doing a slightly bizarre dance. It was kind of a cross between the Chicken Dance, the Moonwalk and one a person can just make up on the spur of the moment. A very frightening sight.

"They said you would never love me,  
They said I was just a fool,  
Holding on to childish dreams,  
Whoever could have known?

You came to need me,  
You came to change,  
Holding on to childish dreams,  
I began to believe.

_They say love can make it easy,  
They say love can make it hard,  
They say love can make a difference,  
To warm a cold mans heart._

What a fool I was,  
What a fool I became,  
They said you'd never love me,  
And you proved them right.

I say love is dangerous,  
I say love is beautiful,  
I say love is just a theory,  
Never to be wrong.

_They say love can make it easy,  
They say love can make it hard,  
They say love can make a difference,  
To warm a cold mans heart._"

Even after the song had finished Donna carried on singing and doing her ridiculous dance, except it wasn't really dancing anymore, it was sad wailing. Everyone in the bar looked at her with pity, they couldn't help it. Their thoughts were like, 'What could have happened to such a woman to make her like this?' This wasn't something they saw everyday.

"Pass me her bag," the bartender instructed Jim who passed it to him.

The bartender was aware of who Donna was, she had made it known the first time she had gone there, secretly of course, and told him that if anything happened he was to call the number that would be written on yellow card inside her purse. There would be a message underneath the number to tell whoever answered to ensure it wasn't a hoax. The bartender was sure this counted as 'something happening'.

"Blue skies hold many secrets," the bartender read down the phone to the man at the other end.

"One second please," his voice was deep and sounded incredibly bored.

- - - - - - - -

CJ's Office, West Wing

"…It needed to be said," Toby cried for the fiftieth time that hour.

CJ just glared at him. It was nearing one in the morning, both were tired but neither seemed about to leave any time soon as CJ had locked the door and was keeping the pocket well hidden from Toby.

"Well it did," Toby pointed out. He was sat on the couch being stared down by a fuming CJ who stood leaning on her desk, arms folded across her chest.

"No, it didn't," CJ countered. "Because it wasn't true now will you just hear this plan? I know it'll work."

Toby sighed but didn't answer, what was the point? He'd known CJ for a long time now; he knew when it was best to just let her talk.

"Ok, so we invite Josh and Kim out on a night out with us," CJ began, ignoring the rolling eyes from Toby. "We'll have a few drinks, enough to make me seem drunk and then you go off to the bar with Josh…"

"If you're about to say that I then tell him that he's mad and that Donna's the girl for him the forget it, I'm not interested." Toby had been caught up in CJ's crazy schemes way too often to know that this one wouldn't work, plus, he knew how stubborn Josh could be.

"Smart ass," she announced when he's finished. "That's not the plan; the plan is much more subtle. The plan is this; you take Josh to the bar and keep him there long enough for me to have a little chat with Kim."

"So it's the same, but reversed?" Toby muttered darkly.

"No, because if it were I would come right out and tell her what's so blindingly obvious to everyone but those three apparently. No, we'll do it with a woman's touch. I'll let my 'loose tongue' let slip a few facts about Josh-Donna history. Rosslyn, Gaza, their anniversary, that kind of stuff. She's a shrink; she should pick it up easily enough."

"It's not going to work," Toby told her gently.

CJ seemed to realise this as she sat on her desk and began considering her plan. There was silence in the room so the sound of the phone ringing startled both of them.

"CJ Cregg," she answered when the phone rang.

"Yeah, hi, you don't know me, my name's Ben and I work at…." The voice on the other end was nervous and in the background CJ could faintly hear the sound of really bad off-key singing.

"Look, I don't know how you got past the security thing but I'm a little busy so if you want to stop wasting my time," she said sharply but was cut off by the man on the other end.

"You know Donna right? Donna Moss."

CJ stopped her mental rant at the man and answered him, "Yeah, why?"

"Well can you hear that?" CJ heard as the winging got louder and then quieter as the man spoke again. "That's her, she's really smashed and you're the lucky person who gets to come get her."

"I think not," CJ answered, not believing for a minute that the woman in the background was Donna.

Donna didn't get drunk, she was always very careful about what she did, drinking especially. She was about to hang up when she realised that it did sound like her and after the way things had been lately she could hardly blame her if Donna had decided to just let herself go for once. And then a new plan formulated in her mind; Donna always had to deal with a drunken Josh, why shouldn't he repay the favour?

"Where are you?" She asked Ben.

Ben told her the address and she wrote it down. "Great, someone will be there soon. Thanks for letting me know." Then she hung up and grinned a wicked smile to a questioning Toby.

"What's going on?" He asked.

Her smile grew. "Let's just say it's a good job plans change," she told him as she began dialling Josh's number.

- - - - - - - -

Downtown Bar

He'd got the phone call at some ridiculous hour in the morning and so didn't really pay much attention when CJ told him Donna was drunk in some bar downtown and needed picking up. Why should he? That wasn't Donna-like behaviour and he was far happier asleep in bed but the more he'd tried to hang up, the more serious CJ seemed, and eventually he agreed to go down just to get her to shut up. Now that he was there, he was glad he had. Seeing your assistant doing some crazy dance while singing the words to some soft rock song you've never heard of is scary enough but when you realise that she's crying her heart out and wearing her pyjamas then you know something's wrong.

"Let's get you home," Josh told her soothingly, stroking her hair softly. "Did you bring anything with you?" He asked as he pulled away from her examining her tear-stained face.

The water in her eyes made them sparkle that little bit more than usual and Josh couldn't help but be amazed by the feelings expressed in those little green orbs. As he stared into her eyes the sounds around him faded, somewhere in the distance he heard a voice.

"Just her bag, it's here."

He was whipped from his reverie and wished instantly he was back there. Shaking his head of all the thoughts running through his head Josh took her bag and led Donna out of the bar, his arm resting around her shoulders. He put her in the car and drove up to her apartment building then helped her out and helped her up the stairs. Laying her on her bed he crouched beside it and studied her carefully.

"What happened to make you drink so much?" He muttered quietly, not wanting to disturb her.

She was lying on her bed looking straight up at the ceiling; her breathing was shallow and staggered. Slowly she turned on her side and looked at Josh.

"You have pretty eyes," she told him randomly, making him smile.

"You do too," he mentioned almost shyly. "Now go to sleep or you'll have a killer headache in the morning."

"I'm not tired," she answered back childishly, taking a pause before continuing. "I want to ask you something."

"Alright, but you have to promise to sleep when you're done." He spoke as though he were talking to a child; soft, gentle and fairly.

Donna nodded. "Do you love her?"

This wasn't the question Josh had been expecting. Granted he didn't know what he'd been expecting but that definitely wasn't it. "I think I might," he spoke even more quietly than he had before, barely above a whisper. He sounded like a little child admitting he'd done something wrong.

He watched as a small tear fell onto her pillow and he took one of her hands in both of his. Misunderstanding her sadness he spoke again.

"Don't worry, you'll find it one day," he told her.

She pulled her hands from him and looked into his brown eyes, searching for something.

"I thought I had but he doesn't love me," she told him turning away from him, supposedly to go to sleep.

Josh waited ten minutes and no sound came from Donna, her breathing became settled and he figured she was asleep. He stood up and began to leave the room.

"Josh?" Her voice sounded frightened and alone.

"Yeah?" He asked coming back over to her.

"Will you stay with me? Just for tonight? I want someone to hold onto right now, I'll be alright after that."

She sounded so scared and sorrowful, how could he say 'no'? He took off his shoes and climbed onto the bed, lying on top of the covers as he took her hands once more. They looked at each others eyes until slowly Donna fell asleep. He kissed her forehead before giving into his own tiredness.

* * *

**A/N: **I did send emails to my reviewers who provided email adresses because I was getting so many reviews all at once! So for those who reviewed without email addresses, or have reviewed since, here's my responses:

**christina0905 **Thanks for the review, I'm glad you like it. After 20 minutes or so I found the site through a link on the another one and found exactly what I was looking for, thanks!

**Nicole10** I did email you but I forgot to say, the link didn't work but I've found it now anyway but thanks so much for trying!

**sekinsey **I get bored a LOT, I've just been out for the day today and have only just finished this chapter, but on the coach back I wrote notes for the rest of the chapters so I should update quickly. There'll be 9 chapters in all I think.

**miss jasadin** Thanks for your review, I'm glad you liked...That's pretty much all of CJ's plan you'll see now, except fora little bit in the next chapter. I wasn't planning on going into much detail with it but then everyone wanted to know so I just had to make something up...Sorry if it's pathetic.

Thanks to everyone who's read, whether you've reviewed or not, I have nearly 1000 hits! All tell me what you think, especially about the song, I want to know if it fits in with the story line.

Rae


	5. The Day After

Donna's Apartment

Sun shone on Donna's face and she winced at the headache it was giving her. She turned away and found herself face-to-face with an angelic-looking, sleeping Josh. What the hell had happened last night? Slowly memories flittered into her head; a bar, dancing, Josh, her bed and a certain conversation before she fell asleep.

"Crap," she said aloud, forgetting for a minute that Josh was asleep.

He stirred and slowly his eyes opened and a smile came on his face.

"Hey," he said tiredly, moving a hand across his face and then through his messy hair.

"Hi," she said awkwardly, trying to get her hand from under Josh's side. He obligingly lifted himself up a little to ensure its release.

"How's your head?" He questioned her, ignoring her nervous smile.

"Hurts," she answered simply. "I thought it was the sun, but I guess it was the drinks, huh?"

Josh smiled widely, showing dimples and some teeth. "Yeah, I'd have thought you'd know better, the amount of times you've had to deal with me the morning after."

"And the night," she said as she got up, unable to stand being so close to him in her own bed. She shrugged, "I just really needed it, I guess." She was looking out of the window, not at him.

Josh nodded understandably. "Donna?" She didn't turn around and she made no sign of acknowledgement. "Donna, look at me."

Against her better judgement Donna turned to face her boss, there were small tears trailing down her cheeks and she wiped away furiously. Josh was immediately on his feet and wrapping his arms around her in a big bear hug.

"Hey," he said lifting her head up so that they were looking into each others eyes. "It's alright to cry, you've been hurt it's what you're meant to do." She nodded weakly in his gaze. "But I want you to promise me something."

"What?" Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"If you need help again then you come to me, not some rundown bar, especially if it's because you've been hurt by a guy so I can deal with him, ok?"

Donna gave him a wry smile but made no such promise. 'I would,' she thought sadly, 'If you weren't the guy.' Instead she wriggled out of his grip and walked away telling him she needed something for her head and that he should go, he had a meeting at nine and he still needed to get changed.

- - - - - - - -

CJ's Office

"Donna, there you are, come here," CJ called as Donna passed by her office to get to Josh's.

"CJ, is everything alright?"

Donna only asked this because CJ looked like she'd had no sleep, was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday and had a rather smug grin on her face. Normally she wouldn't bat an eyelid at this, except possibly the clothes, CJ never wore clothes two days running no matter what the emergency, but as she entered CJ's office, Donna saw Toby sat on the couch in a similar condition.

"Yes, everything's fine. How are you this morning?" CJ seemed ready to burst with excitement and despite the major headache Donna was experiencing, she couldn't help but smile at her friend's energy.

"I'm good, you?" Donna questioned back curiously and amused.

"Well I could be about to get a whole lot better," CJ answered before Toby interrupted.

"Just get on with it CJ, some of us have jobs to be doing."

CJ sighed, "Fine," she rolled her eyes at him before taking on a serious look in Donna's direction. "So what happened last night?"

"It was alright, nothing out of the ordinary happened," Donna answered, pretending to have no idea of what the Press Secretary was referring to, even though it was obvious she did.

"Liar, tell me what happened."

"How do you even know anything happened?" Donna asked a little too quickly.

CJ grinned and was about to answer when an impatient Toby cut across her once more.

"She got a phone call about you being wrecked last night and sent Josh to pick you up, now can you please tell her so I can get out of here?"

Donna nodded, she knew better than to argue with Toby. "Alright, he helped me home, put me to bed and stayed over to make sure I was alright, just like I do with him from time to time. Okay?"

CJ looked slightly crestfallen before she perked up again. "Where'd he sleep?"

"What?" Donna asked in shock.

"You said he stayed over, where did he sleep?"

"Look, is this going to be a thing with the press? Because I'd rather everyone didn't know."

"No, just for me and Toby," CJ answered, her face and voice stayed level but inside she was bursting to find out.

"Fine, he slept in by bed…Or rather on it…Nothing happened," she added at seeing their faces.

CJ looked like all her Christmas' had come at once, Toby just seemed in shock. When neither said anything Donna started to leave. "I'm going, I have to sort Josh's schedule out," she didn't seem enthusiastic about the idea but it was better than staying in this silent room. "Nothing happened," she repeated before they left.

"I don't believe it," Toby muttered when the door closed.

CJ's already wide grin grew. "I told you, didn't I tell you?"

Toby put his head in his hands, "CJ was right, I'm never going to live it down."

CJ hit him across the back of the head teasingly before heading to her phone.

"We have to tell Sam," she said as she dialled his number.

- - - - - - - -

Josh's Office

Kim didn't question where Josh had been all night, she just seemed relieved to see him. She helped him get ready and then saw him off to work before going to her own workplace in the opposite direction. Josh himself was thankful she didn't push it, how was he meant to tell her that he'd spent the night in another woman's bed? Alright, so nothing happened, but that wouldn't matter, she'd just hear the words and not listen for the reasons. It wasn't that he wanted to lie to her, he was glad he didn't have to deal with that. So instead he let her help him get ready and then drove to work. After another check with Donna that she was alright, which he supposed she must have been to be in before him in the first place, Josh went into his office and began the day's work.

Around midday Donna popped her head in the office. "Sam's on line two for you."

Josh nodded and picked up the phone, shooing Donna away.

"Samuel!" He said brightly.

"Joshua!" Sam answered equally as happy.

"So is this a business or a personal call?" Josh asked.

"No business today, I gave everyone the day off since they've been working so hard. How are things going?"

Josh was a little surprised, this was weird; Sam never called in the middle of the day just for the sake of it because he was always working.

"I can't complain. I have a job, friends and the love of a good woman, what more does a man need? How about you? How's sunny California?"

"Not so sunny," Sam answered with a laugh. "I'm sure there's a storm headed but no one believes me."

"Maybe they know how you actually listen to what the weatherman tells you?" Josh suggested teasingly. "How many times do you need to be told not to?"

"Uh, Josh? That's you," Sam pointed out in laughter.

"One time," Josh cried defensively. "It was one time."

"Time enough," Sam quipped. "All it takes is for you to go out in shorts and a t-shirt in the pouring rain…"

"I was ten!" Josh moaned. "I wish I'd never told you that story."

Sam's laughter grew before it settled down and died away. "So look, I called to see how you're coping with your new living arrangements."

"Good," Josh answered. "I got in this morning and there was a suit waiting for me and Kim was there making breakfast for the two of us. I tell you, a guy could get used to it."  
Josh leaned back in his chair, feet on his desk once more.

"You got in? Where were you?" Sam asked casually. Josh, of course, didn't know that Sam already knew the answer.

"Oh, you don't know. The things you miss by being away. Right, so last night I was asleep and CJ called telling me to get down to some run down bar down town quickly. I got there and Donna was there doing her impression of _Ten Things' _Kat. Scariest thing in the world man, I swear it…"

He went on to tell Sam everything else that had happened the night before ending at the events of that morning.

"You slept with her in her bed?" Sam asked incredulously.

"No," Josh answered. "I was on top of the covers, she was underneath. Nothing happened except for sleep. Nothing."

"Did you want it to?" Sam asked randomly, startling Josh to the point that he quickly answered.

"Don't be stupid, I have a girlfriend who I am very much in love with, I wouldn't want to ruin that on some stupid one-night stand."

"But Donna's more than that isn't she?" Sam asked wisely.

"No," Josh said aggressively. "But it's weird," he continued calmly to show he wasn't really annoyed at Sam. "It's the best night's sleep I've had in a long time."

Sam was quiet on the other end for a moment or two before he spoke carefully. "You ever think there might be something to that?"

"Sam, don't be stupid. Donna and I are nothing more than boss and employee; you can ask her yourself…" He was speaking loudly now.

Just then there was a knock on the door and Donna's head popped in. "Kim's here to see you," she sounded hurt, had she heard what he'd said? He hoped not, he hadn't meant it like that; he just wanted Sam to shut up.

"Send her in," Josh responded with his hand over the phone. He removed it and spoke again. "Kim's here, I'm going to go. Do you want to speak with Donna yourself?"

"No, I already have," Sam answered. "Don't be a fool though Josh, I'll call you soon. Oh, and next time we meet? I'm teaching you to watch some good films instead of that teen chick-flick rubbish you watch."

There was a click and then a dialling tone, Sam had hung up, and Josh placed his own phone down before giving his attention to Kim. She didn't look happy.

"Donna just let slip about what happened to you last night," she said angrily. "You stayed with her all night."

"She needed my help," Josh pointed out to her.

"So you could have stayed on her couch, you didn't have to share a bed with her!"

"Why is everyone so caught up over the bed?" Josh asked, mostly to himself. "Nothing happened." He said these two words slowly, as though he were trying to get a simple point across to an intelligence-challenged person and getting annoyed that it wasn't happening.

"I don't care if you were both wrapped in bubble wrap so that no part of you touched; you slept in another woman's bed with a woman who's completely in love with you."

Josh didn't react to her words at first, they just didn't penetrate, but when they did the trouble really started. The realization hit Josh like a ten thousand tonne lead weight. Donna loved him. Thinking about it he could pin point every little sign that told him this. The looks she gave him, the things she said, her willingness to stay with him even though they both knew she wanted, and could do, more, the way she protected him, had watched over him at Rosslyn, her behaviour over the last few weeks, even last night, the words that had made him feel so sorry for her, "I thought I had but he doesn't love me." It was obvious really; he could even say every single date she'd been on since they met was down to it too. She'd had bad date after bad date and always came crying to him when they went wrong. No one could have that bad luck; she deliberately went out with men who weren't right for her. Why had she never told him?

Even though he knew Kim's words were true, he denied them too her. "Donna isn't in love with me," he said but he was only semi-confident in his delivery of this announcement and he said it just a fraction of a second too late.

"That's not what you were meant to say," Kim told him before storming from his office.


	6. Fools in Love

CJ's Office

She wasn't sure why but after storming out of Josh's office, Kim found herself being drawn into another office in the White House.

"Can I help you?" a red- haired woman asked her.

"No, I uh…Who's office is that?" Kim pointed at the offending office.

"The Press Secretary, CJ Cregg" the woman said, giving her a funny look. "If you want to speak to her she's not doing anything…"

"No, no, it's okay." Kim said hurriedly.

"No, wait here, I'll go and get her for you."

The woman knocked on the door and opened it. "CJ, there's a woman out here, she looks a little lost and I really think you should help her."

"Send her in," CJ said with a tired sigh. She didn't want to help random people but the distraction would do her good. "And Margaret?"

Margaret turned to face her boss.

"Make sure yesterday's suit is ready to go to the launderette for me?"

Margaret smiled, "Already done it, I'll drop it off if you like?"

CJ shook her head 'no'. It was bad enough she had to get Margaret to bring her some clothes in today, she wasn't going to let her wash her clothes too, that was plain abuse of the employer-employee relationship. 'Ooh,' she thought as the words hit her. 'That's good; I might remind them to Josh next time he tries to get Donna to do his washing for him.'

This is what CJ was thinking about when Kim entered her office, Josh and Donna's relationship. They were more than boss and worker but less than a couple, it had always struck CJ as how odd that had been but the minute she saw the woman all thoughts of these kind vanished. Kind of.

"I don't know you," CJ pointed out obviously. "I'm CJ Cregg and you are?"

"Kim Jenkins," she watched as CJ's eyes widened in surprise. "I'm sorry," Kim continued. "I shouldn't be here, I was just on my way out, I'm sorry for bothering you."

She turned to leave but CJ called her back, "Wait."

Kim stopped and faced CJ.

"You're Josh's girlfriend, right?"

Kim nodded sadly and a small tear formed on her cheek. She sat on the couch in CJ's office and let a few tears fall before embarrassment got the better of her. This embarrassment came only when CJ joined her in the couch and put a comforting arm on her shoulder.

"I know Josh can be a pain but you made the choice to go out with him, you can't cry about it," she only half-joked when she said this.

"It's not that," Kim said wiping her tears and taking a deep breath. "I just told him that Donna's in love with him and I know he knew I was right but do you know what he said?"

CJ shook her head, letting the woman release her stresses. "He denied it; he told me she doesn't love him. I know it and he knows it, and I wouldn't mind if he agreed with me, I just wanted him to tell me that no matter what she felt for him it didn't matter because he loved me not her but he didn't. He didn't!"

CJ took a breath, understanding why the woman was so upset. "I don't think he'll be telling you any time soon," she told Kim, trying to be gentle but knowing that there was no easy way to say this.

Kim studied CJ's face intensely before she said anything. "Oh my god. I'm such an idiot," Kim wailed, crying into CJ's shoulder by now.

"No, you're not." CJ told her sincerely. "You don't know Josh and Donna, the history behind them. To people looking in they're just really good friends, to anyone who's spent more than five minutes in a room with both of them at the same time, it's obvious. And lately Donna's been staying out of rooms with him, so you wouldn't have seen."

"I knew she loves him," Kim pointed out.

CJ nodded, "And you probably knew he loves her and just didn't want to admit her." She let out a small laugh, "It's not like you'd be the only one around here with a big case of denial."

Kim paused before answering. "Tell me about them," she told CJ.

CJ frowned, "I'm not sure that's such a good idea."

"Please?" She asked, something in her eyes told CJ she needed to hear it.

Giving in CJ told her everything, from the minute they'd met up to now, all she knew. It took a couple of hours because of the questions Kim kept asking but by the end Kim knew the truth, and felt better for it. She knew that Josh was so deeply in denial that it was going to take something big to make him get his act together, something bigger than everything that happened so far. Bigger than Gaza even, an event which Kim suspected he hadn't acted further on because he wasn't sure of Donna's feelings and why would he be after he found Donna had another admirer? That was probably what made him slip back into his old ways of not allowing Donna to progress in her job. He thought he would never have her any other way so he needed to keep her close by somehow. Or at least, that's what the psychiatrist part of her was saying.

Her less rational side was telling her she was a fool for not spotting it earlier and not noticing how like her own life it was. She wasn't angry at Josh, he was using her but he didn't realise he was, he genuinely thought he was in love with her. And Kim didn't fault him one bit, she was doing it herself in a small way. 'This is one mixed-up love triangle,' she thought sardonically.

She rose to her feet, CJ stood with her.

"Where are you going?" CJ asked her caringly.

"I think I need to have a little chat with Josh, don't you?" Kim said boldly. She felt stronger than when she'd first entered the office.

"I guess you do," CJ answered. "If you're ready?"

"No one's ever ready for anything," Kim replied seriously. "We can pretend and think we are, but we never are, especially for something like this."

CJ smiled, this woman in front of her wasn't as evil as she thought she was. In fact, she was quite pleasant; she could understand what Josh saw in her now. "Good luck," she said, giving the woman a quick friendly hug.

Kim nodded and left the room, she smiled at Margaret just to show she wasn't as crazy as she'd acted before and then confidently walked back through the White House to Josh's office.

"Kim," Donna gasped when she saw her. "I thought you'd gone."

"No," Kim said with an odd smile. "Just sorting myself out. Is he busy? Because I think we have some things to talk about."

"No, you can go through," Donna answered. "But Kim? About last night, nothing happen…"

"It doesn't matter," Kim told her. "I know, I understand and I promise you there are no hard feelings." Then she walked into Josh's office without knocking leaving Donna outside to consider her words.

- - - -

Josh was still in his office, his mind perplexed as it thought over what had happened with Kim before. He couldn't understand what had gone wrong but as freaked as he was by events then, it was nothing compared to how he felt the next time he met her, which was a couple of hours later when she barged into his office.

"Do you remember our first date?" Where the first words she asked him as she sat in the visitors chair at the other side of his desk.

"It was only a few weeks ago, of course I remember," he said irritably. He was always like this when he couldn't get his head around a problem, like this one, the one of how radically this woman could change.

"Good," Kim said, ignoring his snappish tones. "Because I want you to tell me what we talked about during dessert."

Josh frowned, "We talked about a lot of things."

"Not during dessert, dessert was given to one topic only, what was it?"

"Um…" Josh said, trying, and failing, to remember.

"I'll give you a clue," Kim rolled her eyes. "It was about a certain beautiful blonde assistant outside who's name begins with 'd' and ends in 'a'."

"We talked about Donna?" Josh asked, more than a little surprised. What kind of person talked about their assistant while on a date? Did he really do it? He began thinking back to dessert.

"Yes, or more particularly something she'd said to you earlier that day."

"That I was like a brother to her," Josh said with an enlightened tone as he remembered what Kim was talking about.

"Exactly," Kim said, giving him a smile. "Remember how you felt?"

"Annoyed," Josh said instantly. "Hurt, disbelief, surprised, confused."

He listed the emotions like they were his weekly shopping list. They came easily and naturally to him, something forgotten but remembered after a catalyst triggered them.

"Right," Kim said, still nodding. "Why?"

Now here was the question he couldn't really answer. He gave the one he'd come up with at the time.

"We've been working together for 6 years and I'd come to think of her as a really close friend but all she saw me as was a brother figure."

Kim gave a noise like a game show buzzer when a contestant got their question wrong. "Nope, try again."

"I…I don't know," he said eventually.

"Alright, what about this then?" Kim asked, giving him her explanation. "You realised a long time that Donna does love you and a lot, but at that moment, as you tried to diminish how much you love her by thinking about the potential of me, you misinterpreted the way she was telling you that she loves you.

"You're sister died when you were young, you've spent most of your life like an only child, you've forgot how strong the love between siblings can be and Donna seems like a person who loves every member of her family more than words can say. When she was telling you she thought of you as a brother she was really saying 'I love you so much Josh, why do you have to be stupid?'"

Josh was silent as Kim's words sunk in. "Really? You're giving me your honest professional opinion and telling me that I'm in love with Donna and was annoyed with her for seeing me as a brother because I misunderstood her."

"Well, no," Kim admitted. "It's not my professional opinion, or even my personal one for that matter, my professional and personal opinions involve a lot more words and things you would never understand but think about what you just said. How easy was that for you to say? You just said you're in love with Donna and you didn't fumble over the words, you didn't try and refute a word I said. You just said it. Granted it was in a context but try it now. Close your eyes and say the first thing that comes into your head."

What was she, crazy? She seriously wanted him to tell her that he was in love with another woman? Still, he closed his eyes and opened his mouth. "I love Donna," the words came out quietly, as though afraid she were listening on the other side of the door and would hear him. His eyes opened in a dramatic style and a shocked look came over his face. He looked at Kim, as though to gauge her reaction. She didn't look shocked; in fact she looked quite smug.

"I knew it," she said simply. "Don't worry, I don't expect you to still go out with me, you've got a woman you really love outside waiting for you to tell her."

"Kim…" He began but she put out a hand to stop him.

"Don't bother, I understand," that was all she had to say on the matter.

"I have a meeting in five minutes and then I'm done for the day. Go to my apartment, Donna will drive you, and make sure both of you stay there, I'll be there within the hour."

"Josh," Kim said with a frown, was he regressing? Did he think they would still be together?

"Relax," he said, seeing her face. "I want to talk to you both, get you to understand but this isn't the place."

"It's not necessary, I already do."

"But I'd feel better, hold on…Donna!" He shouted this last word making his assistant appeared within fifteen seconds.

"What?" She asked him impatiently but worriedly as he said nothing and just looked at her curiously.

Her words shook him out of his trance though and he spoke, "Take Kim to my place, stay with her until I get there, please?"

Donna huffed but did as she was, that was what she did after all, what she would always do. Obey Josh's every wish and command.

- - - - - - - -

Donna drove her car in silence and Kim was making no attempts to start a conversation with her, which suited Donna just fine. Except it didn't because it was an awkward silence and awkward silences were the only kind Donna didn't like.

"Look," she said, looking away from the road and towards Kim. "I just wanted to say –"

"Look out!" Kim shouted as she pointed out of the window beside Donna.

Donna turned too late to stop as her car passed the red light only to be hit by another car going across the cross junction of the roads. Brakes squealed, glass smashed and smoke filled the air, these were the last things Donna noticed before everything went black.

* * *

**A/N: **Ok, so no one mentioned it and I forgot (since I haven't watched and only read about Season 6) but Leo shouldn't be here yet since he's meant to be recuperating and CJ doing his job. For this reason I'm gonna redo chapter 3 so that instead of Leo it's the President and Margaret is Debbie, that's all that'll change, the names so don't feel you need to reread it, it's just for any new readers. That's all I think…Oh, and there were no responses last chapter because I split it in two, this is the second part so here's the responses… 

**kursk** Well, Josh has finally "woken up" but is he too late to do anything about it now? Guess we'll have to wait and see.

**Caia **Josh isn't blind...he's just a little…unseeing! Alright, so he's blind, but he's cute with it :D

**Miss jasadin **Thanks. I can never write drunken characters, they always just sounding like idiots. I was impressed with the way Donna came out. And I'm glad you liked what happened, what about now? You're not going to hurt me because Donna got hurt are you? Oh God, I'm going to have to hide from a legion of Donna-lovers aren't I?

**JDfanatic **well, now you've seen it…Please don't hurt me. And why do so many people seem surprised that Josh is an idiot? I've only just noticed how many do, but he's Josh, he's meant to be!

**Nicole10 **Hmm…I wonder why chapter 4 was the best part…lol. Glad you liked the song, one of my friends said it was dead good and then I wrote this and they seemed to fit together so I wanted to put it in, this was the only way I could get it in.

**Yoshielf **Thank you, that was the main bit I was worrying about with this story, if I wrote the characters well, you saying I have just gives me confidence hugs


	7. A Much Needed Talk

CJ's Office

"Yes, uh-huh, how bad? I understand; he will be there in about…" CJ paused to look at her watch. "Well, soon. Yes, thank you."

CJ hung up the phone and gave a deep sigh, this wasn't good. Pale faced she popped her head out of the office door.

"Margaret, can you get Josh over here please?"

Margaret automatically nodded and began dialling the number of Josh's office. It rang and rang but there was no answer, when CJ heard this, her face paled even more.

"I'll have to get over there then," she said to herself more than anything.

- - - -

White House Corridor

Josh picked up his backpack and, making sure he was leaving nothing of great importance behind, headed out of his office ignoring the phone as it began ringing. On any other day at any other time he would have answered it but today was different, today he would stop for nothing to get back to his apartment where he would tell Donna just how much he loved her. That was why he didn't pick it up and that was why he nearly collided with CJ when she came tearing down the corridor wildly. Hair flying behind her and her pale face in a look of anxiety, CJ slid past Josh before backtracking hastily.

"Joshua," she said urgently, making an already bemused Josh become more so; CJ only used his full name for two reasons – she was either really happy and felt like winding him up or something bad had happened. The look on her face suggested the latter.

"What's wrong? What's going on?" He asked, already having traces of franticness in his voice.

His first thought was of his mother. She was his only surviving relative and he was always conscious that at any moment anything could happen to her and he'd be left alone. While, being as old as he was, this seemed a ridiculous thing to worry about, Josh was well aware that with this came the burden of having to pass on the family name and also the knowledge that he would no longer have anyone to turn to for advice on certain matters without being teased for it. Then, thinking about why he did not want that to happen besides the obvious reasons, his mind turned to every single one of his friends Donna at the forefront of all of them.

"It's Kim…" CJ said but paused at the relieved look on Josh's face.

Of course he wasn't relieved that something had happened to Kim, he was just glad it wasn't Donna or his mother. That is, until CJ's next words when he realised what he had obviously forgot in his relief; Donna was with Kim.

"…And Donna," CJ finished noticing how quickly Josh's face changed. "They were in a car accident."

Josh's face had changed from worry to complete panic. "Are they alright? Where are they? They haven't…" He couldn't bring himself to say the words.

"I wasn't told much, patient confidentiality and all that, but they're at GW…"

Josh was already heading to the front entrance of the building shouting quick thanks behind him. He got into his car and sped out of the car park. He beeped angrily at anyone his way and swore at a couple of close calls when he jumped the lights. He might not be going to his apartment but that didn't mean he was going to stop for anything.

- - - -

George Washington Memorial Hospital

"Donnatella Moss and Kimberley Jenkins, they were in a car accident can you tell me anything about them?" Josh's face was pleading with the stern but bored woman behind the reception desk.

"Are you a relative?" She asked with a weary sigh, she had this conversation a couple of hundred times a day after all.

"No," the word slipped out before Josh had chance to lie. "But I'm Donna's boss and Kim's boyfriend," well that was true; technically they hadn't broke up yet. "I think that puts me somewhere close to a family member."

The woman shook her head, "Not even close," she said with a mocking glance at him.

"You listen here," Josh snapped, his concern getting the better of him. "I work for the President of the United States and I –"

"Josh Lyman I presume?" A man's voice spoke behind Josh making him turn instantly at his name.

"Yes," he gasped, not bothering to ask how the doctor before him knew that. "Have you been treating Donna and Kim?"

The doctor nodded. "And they're both fine," he answered Josh's as yet unasked question.

The relief on Josh's face was evident. "What happened?"

"I think," the doctor said almost knowingly. "That you should ask them that."

"I can see them?" He was surprised, they'd been in a car accident, and surely they needed to rest?

"For a few minutes," the doctor nodded.

"Great, where's Donna?" Josh asked, looking around the reception as though expecting to see her stood there.

"Kim wants to see you first," the doctor said, giving Josh a look that told him that's where he should go first.

Josh didn't argue, he supposed it was better if he did see Kim first, then he could concentrate on Donna without feeling guilty. He went to the room the doctor told him to go to and saw Kim lying there with her leg in a plaster and cuts all over her.

"Are you alright?" He asked her when she noticed him. "It looks painful."

"It's not now," she said with a sly grin. "I've been given lots of morphine; I can barely feel a pulse in my wrist anymore!" She put her left hand on her right wrist as though to emphasise this; Josh couldn't help but smile.

There was silence in the room for what felt like an age and then Kim spoke again, calmly and softly. "You wanted to tell me something," she said. "In your apartment. You might as well tell me now."

Josh looked down at the floor and mumbled something before looking up and trying again.

"Alright, so I wanted to say I was sorry," he said slowly and obviously embarrassed. "I used you, and it was wrong of me but if you would let me explain then I think you will understand why I did."

Kim shook her head. "I already understand Josh," she said in a soothing voice.

"Still," Josh said, convinced but wanting to say it anyway. "I would feel better if I told you." Kim nodded to give her go ahead and Josh continued.

"Alright, so I first Donna over six years ago and somewhere between the campaign and the first month of Bartlett's Presidency I fell in love with her. I don't know how, and I don't when but I did and I knew it at the time but I pushed it back. Bosses aren't meant to fall in love with their assistants, are they? And I knew she was capable of so much more than what I made her do but I couldn't bring myself to let her do it. My thinking was that if I couldn't have her then I sure as hell wasn't going to let her get away from me.

"It was stupid and eventually it became second nature to keep her where she was. I switched off any romantic feelings towards her I had, forgot I even had them and just carried on, ignoring how much her talents were wasted working for me. Then the CODEL thing came up and I let Donna go, that was the whole Gaza thing. I guess that's when my feelings resurfaced, when I heard what had happened. You know the smaller details, I won't go into it all, but by the time she came back to work I wanted her near me more than ever, to protect her. That's why I still haven't let her move on, I don't want her to. It's more than just me needing her, it's…And then she got a date with some idiot waste of space intern and I couldn't help but let my jealousy get the better of me.

"That's when I was talking to Leo and he suggested I talk to Stanley, that's when I met you. On a whim I asked you out and I was determined to enjoy myself, so much so that I convinced myself I was falling in love with you. And well, the rest you know…I'm really sorry Kim."

To his great surprise Kim, who had been trying to interrupt him the whole way through was grinning at him insanely.

"Its fine," she told him brightly, gesturing for someone to come in.

Josh turned and saw a man with straight dark hair, it looked black but in the faint light shining through the window Josh could see it was brown. He was in his late thirties, average height and had gorgeous brown eyes. He looked vaguely familiar to Josh.

"I've been trying to tell you," Kim told Josh with a laugh. "I did the same thing as you only with this man here. Josh, this is Philip, he works at Stanley's with me."

So that's where Josh knew him from! Josh knew he should feel some pang of jealousy, even just a tiny one, but there was none there. Instead he felt elated at the sight and, with a large grin on his face, he stood to shake Paul's hand. Then he bent over Kim and kissed her forehead.

"I'm glad you're okay," he said, and he knew she knew that he meant 'okay' to mean so many things. "But I have another woman to go see to."

"Go get her," Kim said, her smile growing as she watched him began to leave.

Josh turned just before her left. "Look after her, Philip," he instructed. "She's a good woman."

"Yes, sir," Philip said, taking Kim's hand in his. "You don't need to tell me twice."

Josh's smile grew as he watched this serenely happy couple for a moment before turning to go in the next room; Donna's room.

* * *

**A/N: **Had to leave it with an air of mystery on Donna's condition wicked grin I'll write more and responses tomorrow, I'm being hurried off the pc now. Sorry it took a couple of days, been reading _Half Blood Prince. _Yes, I'm a self-proclaimed HP fanatic! So yeah, if there's obvious errors it's because this has been rushed. Hope you like it, kinda pointless but I like it. Enjoy, I expect lots of reviews in the morning :D 


	8. Bedside Confessions

George Washington Memorial Hospital

Josh pushed open the hospital door slowly and let out an audible gasp. There Donna lay looking extremely peaceful and beautiful despite the cuts and bruises that littered her arms and face. She was watching something on the television but she looked over when she heard the door.

"Josh! What are you doing here?" She didn't hide her surprise, she genuinely didn't think he would be there; Kim was in the other room after all.

"I came to see you," he said as he sat down. The smile already on his face shone brightly. "I wanted to make sure you're alright and to tell you something."

Donna studied him for a moment and frowned, this was uncharacteristic behaviour even for Josh. "I'm fine, just have a concussion. What do you want to tell me?"

"I didn't stop for beer and I didn't stop for red lights." He said, watching her face to see what happened next.

What happened wasn't what he expected. Donna's frown grew and slight annoyance cam into her voice.

"That's good Josh, you shouldn't drive when you've drunk but are you crazy?" This last word was almost a shout as she stared at him. "You didn't stop for red light? Your _girlfriend_ was in a car accident because her stupid driver didn't stop and then you decide to do the same thing? You're an idiot!"

Josh's smile faded. He looked fearful and shrank back like a little child being scolded by his mother.

"I didn't stop for you!" He cried back. 'You could have said that better,' he thought to himself tauntingly.

Donna's eyes grew wide. "What?" She asked him quietly.

"I mean the reason I didn't stop was because of you," he answered, his voice back to normal. "CJ told me you'd been in a car accident and I panicked, I thought something serious had happened and I got in the car and I came here. I didn't care about red lights; I just needed to make sure you were okay."

Donna couldn't believe what she was hearing and she refused to accept what he was saying, what if she was misunderstanding him?

"Have you seen Kim?" She asked him, making him jerk his head up.

"Yes," he answered, regretting it instantly when he saw the hurt look on his face.

"So that's why you didn't stop then? Not for me, for her."

"No," Josh said, running a hand down her arm. "I had to see her first, to tell her…"

"Tell her what?" Donna asked him curiously.

"That we couldn't keep dating because I'm in love with someone else."

"Oh," she still wouldn't believe it was her - that was just too unbelievable. "How'd she take it?"

Josh's smile came back bigger than ever. "Good, turns out she was doing the same thing I was, hiding from our feelings."

Donna was silent, what was she meant to say? That she loved him, and then they'd live happily ever after? Life didn't work like that. Josh didn't seem to notice her silence, he carried on and Donna let him.

"I've loved you for so long," he spoke softly, glad they were the only two in the room. "I just didn't want to admit it and after what happened in Gaza and the Germany I should have told you one hundred times a day everyday but I couldn't. I was still afraid and when I saw you with Colin it just seemed like the perfect excuse not to."

Donna remained quiet afraid to say anything in case she couldn't. Her face was saying a lot though; fear, stunned, amazed and every other emotion imaginable.

"Say something," Josh pleaded her.

"Why didn't you say anything after he was out of the picture?"

This, Josh was expecting. "I fought it back, seeing you with Colin made me realise that you might not feel the same way and it'd be stupid for me to jeopardise our personal and working relationships if there was nothing there." He nervously placed his hand in hers. "But I don't care anymore, I love you and this is one close call too many to not tell you."

Donna blinked back tears furiously. "I love you too Josh -"

Her 'but' got cut off by a thrilled Josh who kissed her forehead gently. "I'm going to go see when you can leave."

Donna's tears caught in her throat and she felt like she couldn't breathe. They loved each other, sure, but what was going to happen? Nothing, she'd known the answer for a long time.

- - - -

Josh's Apartment

"I did it," Josh announced a few hours later to a stunned Sam over the phone.

"Did what?" Sam asked warily though his gut told him he knew the answer already.

"I told Donna that I loved her and she said it back," an ecstatic Josh boasted to his best friend.

Sam, with a mixture of happiness for his friend and amusement at Josh's attitude, smiled at the other end. "That's great Josh, but I thought you said you were in love with Kim and you and Donna were just boss and employee."

"Well I was lying, wasn't I?" Josh said like it was obvious, which when he thought about it, it was. "You know that so shut up."

Sam laughed, it was a little crackled in Josh's ear but he recognized the sound. "Alright, so are you going to tell me about it?" Sam asked eagerly, half for his own enjoyment and half because he'd promised CJ under pain of death that he would find out the details.

Josh spent the next thirty telling Sam everything that had happened in the hospital and afterwards when he had taken Donna home and, like the perfect gentlemen, had settled her into bed for rest, told her she was to have tomorrow off, no arguments, and then left, promising he would return the next night. It had taken Josh all his self control not to spend the night looking after her.

"Sounds good," Sam said but with a hint of doubt. Josh, too consumed by his happiness, didn't notice as he continued to talk to Sam about Donna for much of the evening until he eventually went to bed after a warning from Sam.

"Don't ruin this Josh, it's too important."

- - - -

Donna's Apartment

All day Donna had jumped at the slightest sounds, expecting Josh to come in at any minute. It wasn't that she didn't want to see him; it was just that she didn't want to give him the news she would undoubtedly have to. She had always been the practical of the two, that's why she was so good as his assistant but it was also why she knew that they couldn't be together. This was what she didn't want to tell him because she didn't want it to be true and because she knew it would break both their hearts.

Eight o'clock came the knock Donna had been dreading. She padded her way to the door and opened it to see Josh's body, his head covered by the biggest bunch of flowers Donna had ever seen. He moved them down slightly so that his brown eyes looked at her closely.

"Hey," he said with a charming smile. "These are for you," he said handing her the flowers.

She didn't say a word as she took the flowers and went to put them in a vase. As she artistically arranged each one she noticed the different kinds in there; pink and red camellias, white violets, tulips, roses, orchids, white lilies and daisies. Donna smiled at the bouquet, knowing every single one of them he had carefully picked to express his feelings. She hugged him and immediately regretted it when, taking in his smell, she let go of her inhibitions and willingly accepted the kiss he gave her.

That first kiss was perfect; it was as though the world stopped. Donna could hear nothing and see nothing and feel nothing except Josh's arms around her and the feel of his lips. It was all she needed to forget every reason she'd had doubts about him coming over. Every reason. She kissed him again and again, each kiss just as perfect as the last with growing hints of pressure and desire in them. It wasn't long before they headed to her bedroom, years of pent-up feelings being expressed in a night of pure joy.

They both slept soundly in each others arms that night, their perfect night. It was with great sorrow that morning came and they both had to go to work. Even more sorrow when Donna woke up from her peaceful slumber to find Josh looking at. She smiled at him but inside her heart break. She'd dropped her guard and now they were both going to pay dearly.

'Idiot,' she thought to herself as she showered. 'What were you doing, this is going to be harder than before now, a lot harder.'

The water washed away the stray tears that fell from her eyes before she got out and went back to her bedroom to find Josh still there in his trousers, shirt clinging to his toned stomach. Donna didn't blush this time, she just fought back all her feelings, especially the ones that made her want a repeat of last night.

"Josh?" She asked pointedly when she saw him watching her. "Get outside."

He gave her an impish grin before stepping out into her main apartment and making some coffee for them both. Ten minutes later, coffee made and poured, Donna stepped out looking as beautiful as ever, maybe more so. But she looked afraid.

"What's up?" He asked her as he handed her the coffee, frowning as she avoided his attempt to kiss her.

"Nothing," she lied obviously. "But we need to get to yours so you can get changed." Josh nodded, already heading out of her apartment. "And Josh? No one can know."

He nodded, understanding her caution to be that of one trying to avoid public opinion over their new found relationship.

* * *

**A/N **That should please a few of you before the next, and final, chapter. There'll be a epilogue too, so technically there are two chapters left and in both of them you'll see why I wanted the conversations between Josh and Donna. Now to the responses:

**kursk **are all my chapters great? You write that at the beginning of everyone! Well, now you've seen Kim help them and you've seen Josh's 'declaration', what else do you want to see?

**Caia **I based Kim on annoying friend of mine, you should have seen her face when I showed you the review and heard all the things she wanted me to do and say to you! Best 20 minutes of my life, lol. Donna didn't die yay! But she's not really alright is she?

**Lu78** Now you know, he went to both, but he definitely wanted to go to Donna's first.

**JDfanatic **There's one more twist to come, and it's a good 'un!

**Nicole10** Glad you like it. Josh only wanted both of them so that he could talk to them both at the same time, as it was he had to do it singularly, which worked out better all round obviously.

**miss jasadin **wipes browThere wasn't that many people, thank God! So, they got it together, what do you think? Realistic or not?

**Meganfitz **You liked it that much hugs Thanks! And my lips are sealed, don't you worry.

**Clear Reaction **As you heard there's more, just a little bit but I'll make it thrilling, gripping stuff…It might be a little repetitive though… I'm glad you like it, might soften pain that's due to come any time in the next 36 hours…

**Yoshielf **We're not quite there yet but it'll be good.

**Kaatsukii **That better not have been the scary swaying/bobbing dance thing, 'cos that should never be associated with such a fantastic piece of writing:D Oops, Danielle, I should make sure she knows there are more chapters, doesn't save the link you know, how silly of her…

Thanks to everyone! The reviews have nearly filled up the 5th page, except for those last two lines of the chapter! R&R! WAIT! This review came wjile posting this chapter!

**love2readfanfiction2 **Not long, not long at all, I'm glad you liked it. Yeah, I finished HBP, loved it. Won't go into details for those who haven't but your son has great taste in books :D


	9. Heartbreak House

**A/N **Last chapter before the epilogue so I just want to thank everyone and warn all of you that have seen season 6; this will be repetitive, for those who haven't; there's spoilers galore! Enjoy it, and don't hurt me, sometimes these things need to happen…

* * *

White House Corridor

She wasn't sure what she expected that day but for everything to be the same wasn't it. Thinking about it, Donna knew that big flashing lights announcing her and Josh were finally together seemed a ludicrous idea but then, maybe, it would have been preferable to what was happening. Everyone was acting the same and Donna didn't like it one bit because things weren't the same, not any more. She felt like her big night should have changed the world and, indeed it changed hers but the bigger world, the one of her job and everything else, was still the same and that was more than a little disconcerting. She supposed it had affected her work a little; the dynamic between her and Josh was the same but different at the same time and Donna wasn't so sure she could handle it.

Take this morning for example, the two of them were sat in Josh's office doing something they'd never done before; eating breakfast together whilst singing a slightly out of tune version of Mamas and Papas' _Monday, Monday_. It was cute and Donna liked it but then the phone call came about a meeting with Didero, this led to the topic of lunch with each other because Donna needed to talk to Josh. She wanted desperately to talk to him about what she was feeling and Josh was putting it off preferring to try singing again. Suffice to say Donna was more than a little hurt but before she could say anything the quiet day was interrupted with news of the President having an MS episode, obviously she couldn't bring anything up then and so she put it off. Just like she always did.

As the day got more hectic they missed their chance for lunch, Donna tried again in his office a few hours later.

"Can we do this now?" She sounded a little impatient but Josh, too busy with the new situation of an asteroid heading to Earth, didn't pick up on it.

"What?" He asked, not really looking up from the papers he was sorting through.

"The conversation that was supposed to happen over lunch, but that ship sailed so let's just have it now," she was snapping at him by now but she didn't care, she needed to say this.

"Can't. World ending." He said it so calmly Donna felt like hitting him.

"I thought it wasn't hitting?" Not for the first time she wished she was more up-to-date on these details, which she would be if Josh ever let her progress higher.

"Might."

"I thought there was nothing you could do." She was getting more desperate to have this conversation now, how could he not be picking up on it?

"There isn't. Doesn't mean the situation's not to be monitored closely. Tomorrow, lunch, definitely." That said he walked confidently out of the room, Donna watched him go with an increasing sense of annoyance that she showed by letting out a low growl before leaving the office herself.

Now, a few hours later, Donna couldn't wait until tomorrow, she couldn't even wait until that night, she had to do it now and nothing would stop her. She saw him walking down the corridor and hurried after him quickly.

- - - -

Josh had taken a quick break from the mayhem of this once peaceful day to make a phone call to Sam. He gave his best friend a brief recap of the previous night (no details obviously) before he said perhaps some of his most significant words ever.

"I never believed in soul mates, I mean, it's all fairy tale stuff, right? The stories your parents read you to help you sleep, it's not real. At least, that's what I thought, until she entered my life. I never really realized at first, but she's mine. And you knew it all along, you should have made me realize sooner."

"I tried," Sam answered. "We all did, you were just too stubborn but now you have don't mess it up."

Josh hung up with a good feeling determined not to ruin his relationship with Donna, he just sat there for a few minutes before he went off to talk to Will. He was still talking to Will on his way back so he ignored Donna at first.

"I need you," she sounded determined but Josh wasn't listening as he continued to talk to Will.

"See? Tell them to put me on the list."

"We're having our conversation now," her voice was so hard that Josh couldn't ignore it this time but he avoided asking what about at first, he was sure he could guess and he didn't want it to happen.

"Don't you think it would be irresponsible for me to leave this administration before the end of the second term?" He asked her in an obvious stalling way.

"It's a conversation about me, not you," she said, a heavy sigh in her tone.

"I got to get over to the OEOB," anything to avoid this conversation.

Losing all her patience Donna spoke rather waspishly. "You have to sit down and talk to me, that's what you have to do."

"You're very demanding today," he pointed out, trying, and failing, to be cute. "Even Leo thinks I should be wandering the American byways in search of the next President."

That was it, Donna had enough, she couldn't do this anymore. It was the same every time and it was killing her. "I quit," she announced making him stop a little.

His heart started beating a little faster, something in her tone told him she was serious and that she didn't just mean she was quitting her job.

"What?" He said as Donna stopped walking and Josh turned to face her. "Come on! No you don't. Walk with me."

"Look at my face," she told him sternly. "I'm not messing with you."

"Donna –" he tried pleading with her but was cut off.

"There's going to be a temp here tomorrow."

Josh took in a deep breath, still unsure of how much she was quitting. "Oh, for ... we were supposed to have lunch ... I cancelled ... it was crappy of me."

"This is what we were going to talk about." Donna said, not accepting his apology.

Josh began to panic. "I-I-I ... tomorrow –"

"We were going to talk about where my job was going. Because though working for you is an honour and a privilege, I'm ready for more and it's not happening here and I've started looking and –"

'She's started looking?' Josh thought frantically. 'How long has she been planning this?'

"Slow down. Slow down," he instructed, interrupting her. "We'll talk about it. Absolutely. You're right. Tomorrow, lunch, you and me."

He couldn't do it right now, he had stuff to do, and so instead he walked away from her muttering to himself quietly. If he'd turned around he'd have seen Donna's heartbroken and teary-eyed face as she watched him go before she headed to her desk and began packing her things away. She was getting that temp in early; she couldn't handle seeing Josh again.

- - - -

A few hours later there was absolutely no trace that Donna had ever been in the White House. All of her belongings were gone, her desk neat and tidy, a temp sat behind it a fact that took Josh a while to register. His mind hadn't really been on his job since Donna announced she was leaving. He new she was serious and he knew she meant she was leaving the White House and she was leaving him so he figured he had just a few hours to try and convince her to change her mind. When he announced that the asteroid had missed Earth he headed to his office trying to come up with the perfect plan, involved in this he failed to notice that the blonde-haired love of his life wasn't at her desk but instead another woman who seemed to be making herself quite at home. When he did his heart beat so fast he thought he might have a heart attack at any minute.

"Hi," he said slowly, giving her an odd look.

"Can I help you?" She asked sincerely with a pleasant smile on her face.

"Where's Donna?" He asks her urgently.

She frowned. "Who's Donna?"

"You're sitting in her chair," Josh pointed out to her, resisting all urges to roll his eyes.

"The blonde girl?" She questioned as she realised who he was talking about.

"Yeah," Josh croaked quietly.

"I'm Marla Worski. I'm covering this desk for a few days. You need something?"

"I'm Josh Lyman," he told her matter-of-factly, informing her who was boss. "What are you…"

'Oh no,' he thought when he realised what exactly she was doing there. 'She's left already, oh God, now what am I going to do?' Panicking he asked the next question.

"You're a temp. She'll…She'll be back in a few days, you said?" His voice cracked towards the end but he didn't care, he needed to know she'd be back, that this was just her teaching him some kind of lesson.

Marla looked at him with intense pity. "She got a new job, I think. I've got her cell if you want to give her a call?" She handed him a slip of paper with Donna's cell phone number on but Josh just looked at it blankly as he headed silently into his office.

'She left,' he thought gravely as he sat in his chair. 'She finally left me, I can't believe it…'

He slammed the paper down and headed to Leo's office. The man had only been back a few hours but Josh looked up to him like a father figure so where else was he going to go?

"Donna quit," he announced when he got in there.

Leo looked up at him, obviously thinking. "Donna Moss?" He questioned though he was fairly certain that's who Josh meant.

"She's gone," Josh reiterated the grief on his face obvious as he didn't even bother to hide it.

"You piss her off?" Leo asked, figuring they'd just had another argument and she'd be back tomorrow morning.

"I don't know," Josh half-lied, he knew he had, he just didn't know what he'd done. "She has a new job."

"Good for her," Leo announced, not seeing the real problem. "See I tried to tell you this," he said as he walked past Josh to leave the office. "People move on."

He left a heartbroken Josh in the office.

'How can she move on?' Josh thought, close to tears that wouldn't flow. "We were perfect yesterday."


	10. Epilogue

It was hard to believe how much had changed in the past month. Josh had gone from loving a woman in denial, to admitting his own denial, to loving Donna, which was the best night of his life, absolutely. But he still couldn't help but wonder about how much it had all changed. It had all been so perfect, what happened? He was pondering this as he subconsciously walked back to his office to get his backpack before he went home, alone, without her. He was tempted to make a detour, go to Donna's but he didn't know what to say and he was fairly certain she didn't want to see him. What was he going to do? He couldn't live without her, if he had he'd have let her go a long time, couldn't she see that?

He got his backpack and left, not noticing the post-it note stuck to the front of it. In unnatural silence he drove the long way to his apartment, the way that passed Donna's apartment. There were no lights on but he knew she was in there, he could feel it. Fighting the temptation to knock on her door until he knew what he was going to say, Josh drove on eventually finding himself in his own apartment.

Shattered and broken he sat on his couch and thought about all the times she'd been in his apartment, all the times he'd been in hers, every interaction the two had ever had, the day they met, the previous night…Basically he thought about her and soon his thoughts drifted to what he'd told Sam earlier that day.

_I never believed in soul mates, I mean, it's all fairy tale stuff, right? The stories your parents read you to help you sleep, it's not real. At least, that's what I thought, until she entered my life. I never really realised at first, but she's mine._

He was so stupid, he should have realised sooner, she might still have left but at least they'd have had longer together. He looked around his apartment and gave a heavy sigh. He'd made an unconscious effort to keep it tidy after Donna had tidied it for him and seeing his backpack sitting on the floor by his door just made it untidy. He picked it up, ready to put it away when he noticed two things; the first was the post-it note on his bag, the second was a rectangular piece of paper underneath the bag.

He picked the latter up and noticed Donna's handwriting on the envelope immediately. He tore it open and read the letter inside.

_Josh,  
__By now you'll have noticed I've gone and you'll still be wondering why, please don't worry about it, it's something that had to happen.  
__I've not been happy in my job for a while, you know that and I understand why you wouldn't let me go but I need to grow Josh and it's not happening with you. You tried, I know you did, but you slipped back so quickly and it's stifling me. You remember when we met? You knew instantly about 'Dr Freeride' and everything that had happened, I knew from the way you sounded you were nothing like that and I don't think you are, but you're still stopping me, you understand? I needed to get out of that before it happened again. I have a new job now, a place where I can grow fully and it's all because of you, I thank you for the opportunity.  
__And I know the timing couldn't be more worse, we finally find truth in each other and I leave but please, don't think it's because I don't love you because I do Josh, more than you'll ever know but that's why I have to leave. If we get together now then it'll be disaster for everyone…Us, the administration. We'll never be private, they'll think I'm with you to get ahead and there's been enough scandal in this administration it'll ruin the chances of all Democrats. I know you understand Josh, maybe one day we'll be alright but right now it can't happen. Another reason I had to leave, I can't stand to be so close to you after last night. So close and yet so far, it'd kill us both.  
__You know I'm right and I know we'll be together one day. Until then remember us Josh because it's just a case of wrong time, wrong place at the minute.  
__All my love  
__Donna_

There were no kisses at the bottom of the letter, there didn't need to be, her words said it all and Josh, finally knowing the reason, didn't feel any resentment towards Donna. In fact, he felt more admiration and love for the woman than he had ever felt before. He looked at the post-it note and saw Donna's cell phone number scribbled on it. He immediately dialled the number, still unsure of what to say but knowing that if Donna could write that he could say something.

- - - -

Donna was crying into her pillow when the guitar-like sounds of _They __Say_ that was her cell phone ringtone, sounded. She knew who it was instinctively. Josh was the only one who rang that early or late. She shut out the sound, letting it ring off. It rang again, and again, and again until eventually the tune annoyed her so much that she answered it.

"Josh, please don't," she whimpered down the phone.

"I got your letter," he said, ignoring her plea.

"Good," she answered. "So now you know, leave it at that until it's time."

"And how will I will know when that is?" He asked her urgently.

A small smile played on her lips, he wasn't angry with her. "When the reasons don't matter."

"They don't matter to me now."

"But they will, one day they won't, and then love will be enough Josh but right now it's not."

With that she hung up on him. When he didn't ring back she knew he was alright and that no matter what happened, they would both be waiting for that day to happen. The day when the reason had no consequences. Until then they would wait, and hope and remember because that's all there was left to do.

* * *

**A/N **Alrighy, I don't want to say much and lose the impact but that's the end! There are no plans for a sequel but that doesn't mean there won't be. And I know you all wanted a happy ending but it was never on the cards, I'm a big JD fan but they were never going to end up together, not here. Look back at the A/N on the first chapter, I did say that it was the real reason for Donna leaving. That said I'm going because I have a room to tidy before it gets redecorated at the weekend. I'll respond to all reviews by email when I've managed to avoid the flames heading my way! So if you want a response I suggest you leave an email address. BYE! 


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